5 – Lets say I’m at a house party in the middle of nowhere and we made the mission in a mates car. It gets to 3 am and there’s no way we’re getting home the best place to pass out would have to be the car, that way you can lock the door turn the heater on and tune into the radio.Its like a minny formula one hotel right out side the party.

4 – Ok its a week day and those after work beers turned into after work maggot fest, im out in the city at 6am still in my work uniform and closer to work than I am home, I’m going right back to work to pass out in the lunch room. That way when 9am comes around I’m fully dressed and right where I need to be for a full day of work.

3 – If I’m having a piss up at mine and that last joint really got me spinning and I need to flake out. I know my mates are going to cover me with dick n ball pictures and fuck know’s what else if I pass out on the couch, the only option is the toilet floor. That way if I yak the dunny’s got my back, there’s a lock on the door and the showers right there as soon as I wake.

2 – Say I’m as drunk as a koala but agwa was my main diet for the night not eucalyptus leaves, I’m walking home through the park but my legs start to buckle and I need to pass out for a few winks, I’m going to do as koala’s do and nestle in the safest tree I can find. That way I’m safe from street sweepers and hobo’s and the view of the city is breath-taking. I call it the “Swiss family maggotsons retreat”

1 – I’d have to say my number one place to pass out is the hospital waiting room. You go there at 5 am and there’s body’s laying everywhere no one gives a shit if there’s an extra body laying across 4 waiting room chairs. There’s great food, sometimes hot nurses and if you choke on your own spew you’re in good hands.

Purchase Maggot Mouf’s – You’re All Ears here (JB Hi-Fi).
Purchase Maggot Mouf’s – You’re All Ears here (Big W).